To my friends – Ashu, Miguel, Angel, Cagri, Andres, Gilberto, Karina and Federico
It was as wild as Bugs Bunny on an aphrodisiac. On a fornicating spree. Only it wasn’t Bugs Bunny, it was the UT Students. It wasn’t aphrodisiac, it was sheer madness and ‘spirit’ and it wasn’t a fornicating spree. It was Halloween!
I had heard the stories of the crowd going berserk on the 6th Street but I was about to discover it first hand today. You know when I go grocery shopping and I buy too many vegetables that exceed the size of the crisper, I stuff it in somehow, squishing the tomatoes, twisting the gourd and pulping the lemons. I totally empathize with them after this night. I open my fridge and the tomato looks up and says “Aha! Been there, seen it! Do you get it now how it feels to be groped my fellow species!”
My non-Indian friends had celebrated Diwali with me so I decided to go for Halloween with full steam. I was dressed as a County Cop with a badge, goggles, shoes and everything. Just my Allen Solly belt was a dead-giveaway! Now I couldn’t wear my regular glasses so I put it in a friend’s purse and I was walking with my prescription shades on which made the dark night ever darker and me half-blind. But then, in the crowd bumping was unavoidable anyways. After all it beat the Mumbai Local Trains hands down.
I must admit that Americans can be creative in the weirdest ways possible and they do put in a lot of effort to make that creativity come alive. Some of the funniest, spookiest, LMAO and gross costumes I saw –
5 guys dressed as blocks of Tetris who managed to carry 5 ft high blocks and sat interlocked on the street. So many Sarah Palins that if indeed they were republicans then McCain need not worry. A guy dressed as an Investment Banker with his wife in front of him and a board on his head “On Sale For 1000$. Sell everything. The market is crashing!!“. The famous Batman and Joker duo at times seen with the entire crew of Justice League. So many girls dressed to the point of endorsing ‘sluts are us’. Fred Flintstones and Welma, entire cast of Loony Tunes, guys dressed as playmates, incredible hulk and there were some other cops too beside me. At one point I even crossed some real cops who were patrolling the area. Whoopsy Daisies ! I asked one of them for a picture and he said ‘sure’. Also the grossest of costumes (but I did laugh my heart out) was this Guy dressed as a huge dick down the minutest details. Who makes that stuff !! “Oh yes Sir. Please stitch me a weeny. Yeah 6 foot long. That’s right. Don’t forget the pockets!” If that’s isn’t creativity then Osama is really dead.
And in all this hustle I lost sight of my friend who had my glasses and I was stuck with my shades with which I was seeing white as grey and without which black. We went into a pub and the doorman asked me to take off my glasses inside to avoid stepping on someone’s toes. “Buddy without it I’ll walk OVER someone and not know”. Eased my feet after miles and hours of walking and it was 02:00 soon. Took the bus back to campus, which was now looking like how it would look when civilization is wiped out. Totally deserted. My flatmate Ashu, was guiding me along. “Here, step up to the sidewalk. Lookout, there’s a pole. Dogshit! Oops! “ I reached home unscathed.
This was my first taste of American Festivity and I can’t say that I did not love it. It was wild and lively and I slept a drunk, jay-walking, unruly cop tonite.
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